Well, folks, it's that time of year again: Valentine's Day.
And chances are, you're doing one of two things:
1. Enjoying (or anticipating in pure bliss) a higly romantic pastime with your significant other, such as an elegant dinner, a Disneyland romp, or an intimate coffee date.
2. You're sitting on your couch watching Pride and Prejudice while eating Haagen-Dazs ice cream and crying your eyes out. (You cry a little harder when Darcy tells Elizabeth that she has bewitched him body and soul)
To any guys who are reading this, chances are you will not be participating in the specific example provided in option two. At least, I should hope not ...
But male or female, you get the point, right? Why does Valentine's have to be either the happiest, most magical day of the year, or the most depressing? After years of "celebrating" Singles Awareness Day, I definitely fell under the latter category.
But this post is to all of my fellow single peeps who are tired of being S.A.D. As for me, I am pleased to announce that after almost seven years of whining, complaining about my singleness, and dying for a boyfriend, on this day I can say with the utmost confidence,
I am single, and I LOVE it.
Easy for you to say, you think. Some of us over here are still pretty depressed. Well, hopefully what I have to say encourages you a little bit. Bear with me.
So why am I not crying on the couch today eating chocolate ice cream, wallowing in self-pity, and watching romantic movies? Well, it's mostly because lately, God has helped me realize one thing:
My days as a single are truly gifts from above.
These are days when I can become involved in a sorority, get excited about my studies and future career, hone my talents, wake up every morning with a cup of tea and my Bible, spend time with beloved girlfriends, and put my time that I could be spending with a boyfriend into more beneficial pursuits, like ministering in the church, volunteering, etc.
Most of all, God is helping me discover who I really am.
And through it all, He is teaching me another truth: true love is also a gift from above.
And like all gifts, it must be given.
Which means that I dare not seek it out, strive for it, or spend my entire life pining for the day when it will actually happen. That's pretty much a waste of a life, if you ask me. And it's a waste of energy. It's tiring.
Now, don't think that I arrived at this conclusion without tears and pain. Yes, I had to learn this the hard way.
I could tell a long story, but it would not fit on the page. If any would like to talk to me personally about it, I would be more than happy to, especially since it has a happy ending and proves just how wonderful our Savior really is. One thing I just have to say, though. God revealed something precious to my heart on a day when I was lots in a dark cloud of loneliness and depression. He lured me to a quiet spot, a grassy lawn on my campus under the comforting shade of a tree, and He spoke these words to me. The "him" for you ladies reading this can refer to a future husband. Or for you guys, just replace the "him" with "her" to refer to a future wife.
Surrender him. Let him go. Give him up to my loving care. Relationships are not to be sought after or striven for. They are gifts to be given. By Me. If you are constantly striving to take him for yourself, you will continue to strive in sweat and energy to keep him. But, if you let him go and surrender him to me, you can trust Me that in My perfect timing, I will give him to you as a gift. Then he will be yours to keep. Then you will know that it is I who has given him to you. It will be a sweet and perfect gift, so much so that you cannot help but point to me and give me the glory for it. Entrust him to me. Set yourself free from striving. I will give you my perfect gift in my timing.
So today, I rejoice in my singleness, in the great love of my Savior, and in the promise that, if it is meant to be, my husband will be a joyous gift given to me by my precious King. I will wait however long it takes. For I would not trade my days of celibate freedom for anything.
But my darling, whoever you may be, I will wait until the day when I can make a full commitment to you and love you with the love of God above. And I know you will be completely worth it.
So to all my single friends, put down the ice cream, wipe away your tears, and spend today rejoicing for another day to be single, to hang out with friends, to grab a cup of coffee and curl up with your Bible, to spend a little more time with the One who loved you so much, He gave His life for you.
I'm content to be single. Are you?